First of many freak outs

I have discussed my paranoia on here before. here. here. and here.

And I know that having a baby would not help that, but I was not prepared for what happened today.
I have started going out with just me and Cdubs in the car. I thought I would invest in those rearview mirror things because I didn't think it would be worthwhile for our short while here.

But with a few roadtrips in our future, I broke down and bought one. It is great and has a beanbag weight on the mirror so you can easily move it from one car to another.

plus it is a monkey!

So the first day I went out with the mirror and baby in tow. I went to adjust the mirror to see the baby and saw an arm reaching out from behind the car seat!!! There was a person in the car about to grab the baby!!!!!

I looked back and realized that I was in a car not a truck...there was no where for a person to be behind the baby like in my SUV...
I looked back in the rearview mirror and went to straighten my hair like I did before and noticed the arm in the mirror again.


The facing mirrors had created the infinity mirror effect causing me to see the back of my arms. I am an idiot. And paranoid.
I am a paranoid idiot.

Cdubs has no hope of having a normal mother. (again, Holy CRAP I'm someone's MOM!--when does it stop being a shocking statement?)

Like a trucker cruisin' on the Interstate Mom

tell me that doesn't remind you of a trucker leaning out his big rig checking out the scenery....
An unflattering picture, I'll give you that, and photo booth is washing my girl's pink cheeks out. But that face, the I'm-content-as-lazy-house-cat look or the Eat-shepoopie-and-die look (I can't decide which one she is giving at the moment) is hilarity

Punk Rock Baby

Top: Queen "we are the champions" onesie from Target
Bottoms: heart polka dot leggings
Socks: Red converse shoe-socks

Picking an outfit that irritates my mother: Priceless

Missing the K in Kdubs

So Kdubs left for Vienna for good on Sunday.
When I say for good, I just mean he has moved there. He packed 8 bags and left us.

It was sad, but it was much more tolerable than his previous departure. And I figured out why:
Cdubs.

Yeah, KW was partially right, she relieves a lot of my boredom when he is gone. But she also makes me have to buck up and be THE MOM! (holy hell, I'm someone's mom!!!) I can't wallow in self pity and cry myself to sleep. I have to take care of her...all the time.

It has been a good feeling. And she just makes me happy. Cheeks like hers does that.

I miss him like crazy but I honestly think he might miss us more. I mean how can you not miss the cheeks!

And no, we don't have a leave date for us yet. The reason why: my dad is having some heart issues (they were known before but he is getting somethings checked out on the 25th) and we are waiting for the all clear to leave (or leave and come back if he needs surgery). I don't always like asking for prayers, because I know that God will take care of us and him (and I do know the power of prayer even with that knowledge) but it feels selfish to ask for prayers sometimes (maybe it is just me, I'm weird). Anyways, if y'all could send some good thoughts, prayers etc out on the 25th, I'd appreciate it.

***new pictures coming soon***

The difficulty in posting

It is difficult to post while swinging your baby around the room like a mad woman (she is in her moby wrap)....in an effort to calm and soothe her.

Please tell me some of you watch the Middle, with Brick and his soothing...it the height of hilarity.

I am trying to find a clip to share with you...but I am failing and baby is crying.

Okay will post better later...when you know who is sleeping.

A month with Cdubs

Cdubs is now almost 6 weeks old!

And here are some happenings in her life so far:

Nursing has finally gotten easier. I could write a whole post on the turmoil of the first few weeks of nursing, but I am actually liking it now and thanking God that she is a great nurser.

She came in at just under 11 lbs at her one month well visit. She is very long, especially in the torso (just like her mom!).
Our pediatrician also 'recommended' that we start getting her to sleep through the night (aka stop the night feeding).

It has been an adventure. The first few nights, she slept from 12-5 or 6 but then she started to try and sleep earlier (10 or 11) and waking up earlier. She is still making it around 5 hours at a stretch, which is great! But we want to instill good sleeping habits as well. Her ped said that at her weight her kidneys and system can stay in "fast" mode for seven hours...so hoping for 6 is not a big deal. But it feels like a big deal. We are also letting her cry herself to sleep a bit (she cries for 5 minutes or so and then we comfort her and put her down--usually she is calm and sleeps pleasantly after one or two comfort sessions.

She is getting more and more alert, more smiley, and just more fun!

We also survived our first couple of nights without Kdubs, while he was in California. It was hard not having someone to pass the baby off to every once in awhile. He is leaving for Vienna on Sunday, and we do not know when I am going. So it could be a month or so until we see him. I hate thinking about it.

But this sweet baby makes a lot of things worth it.