Friday, August 15, 2008

I'm quirky--okay just plain weird

Let's do a show of hands okay?

Who here knows I am a weirdo? (oh, well you don't have to be so enthusiastic with your show of hands) Okay so that is everyone.

Who here finds my weirdness adorable and quirky? (KW raise your hand, please)

Who here has certain quirks that you don't readily admit? (ah, see slower with the hands this time)

There are certain things that I have considered sharing on the blog that I have quickly dismissed because I may lose my readership (yes, all three of you, shut it...i value you!).

But I'm going to suck it up and bare my soul and some of my eccentricities.

1.) I don't like going to the bathroom in public. Now, I know most people would prefer to "go" at home, but I really really dislike it. I'm not so weird that I won't "go" out...I just have things I do to deal with it. Like squatting, trying to touch nothing with my hands, and if something touches the floor...its gone, just leave it. I have lost many a chapstick to this cause. After washing hands, use paper towel to grab handle if it swings you don't have to touch anything, remember? Seriously, if I ever become elected to public office, I would make it law that all bathroom doors swing out. Like surgery rooms.

My hatred of public bathrooms has been exacerbated at work. Where there are 500 people (instead of my usual 20) and the staff bathrooms are cramped and cold. So I have a bathroom that I feel is farthest away from foot traffic, has space, a purse hook, and is warm. The best part of my day is when I walk in there and I know it hasn't been used yet. Wait!!! how do I know it hasn't been used...the lid is still up from the cleaning during the night. Now I still follow all my rules, but it just makes my weirdo heart scream with glee a little.

(So have I lost you yet...Darnie, can you guess which bathroom I'm talking about?)

Okay so I talked too long about that one...I guess I'm too passionate about bathrooms...see weird.

I'll be filling you in on my weirdness later, trust me. If there is anyone left.


Curtis said...

You need to start using the right terminology, Alex. Your secret bathroom is technically called a "safe haven." For more information on this and all the other details about how to succesfully use the bathroom at work, just Google "how to poop at work." Enjoy the hearty laugh that you are about to receive and I hope this wasn't too crass for a family blog.

Erin said...

You are hilarious! I don't like public restrooms much either, but I'm not that bad.

Hmmm...what am I weird about...I'll have to think about that one!

My Wonderful Men said...

How funny, I said the same thing about public bathroom doors, they should swing out like a surgery room.

I am the biggest germ freak, I'm so bad I passed it along to my son. Yes, vote me bad mother of the year everyone.

3boys247 said...

LOL. It is ok, I understand all the germ phobias. But it's not weird enough for me to stop reading your blog.

I am weird about which side of the bed I sleep on. It has to be the side furthest away from the door. You know so my husband can get the bad guy before the bad guy can get me. This is especially important in hotel rooms or when I move furniture in our bedroom. Yes, weird, I know.

Buffalo Betty said...

My quirk (but TRS already knows it)- I hate birthdays that are prime numbers. Something about 29, 31, 37, 43... that sounds so much worse/lonely than 30, 35, 42, etc.!

McMommy said...

I am a public bathroom freak.

hate them. hate them. hate them.

And when you have kids...and they are all "What's that? What's that? What's that?" touching EVERYTHING IN SIGHT in the bathroom...ughhhh!! I'm the one you'll hear screaming: "DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!"

Dana said...

I have already done my post on my feelings about public bathrooms. One thing I couldn't share was about the one at work. We have 1 bathroom with 4 stalls, and about 60 women. There are some seriously NASTY women where I work. One has even made a comment about what coffee does to her, and once said "watch out, I had coffee this morning". All I have to say about that is, if it doesn't agree with you, DON'T DO IT! That bathroom ALWAYS stinks REALLY bad (like hold your breath), even worse than the men's room.

amanda said...

oh just another reason i love you.

(again i know how you feel about the "l" word, but i said it. deal with it.)

seriously. public bathrooms. i will drive all the way home with legs crossed if i have to.

i will sooo be that old lady wearing diapers.

The Microblogologist said...

I confess, I don't like to poop when there are other people in the bathroom at work/school, especially the small two stall one across from my lab on the 3rd floor. If I walk in and there is someone in that one I will turn around and go to one of the second floor bathrooms. Believe it or not I am not paranoid about the "germs", I wash my hands properly and don't worry about the rest.

Bacteria are everywhere, always have been and always will be, they didn't hurt you before you knew they were there... The vast majority of bacteria are completely harmless and many are actually beneficial. I am more concerned when food is involved, I've taken way too many food micro/safety courses! I also frequently spray wounds with alcohol, people who see me do it tend to think that is odd.

If you weren't quirky you would be boring =).

the ben show said...

I know you are a weirdo because I am a weirdo and I only frequent blogs of other weirdos! I feel for you on the bathroom thing - I do not have that problem, but my husband does...

Anonymous said...

I totally agree! And I have a love/hate relationship with the oh so clingy provided toilet seat covers. I think they must put some sort of special subatance on them to make them stick to the most bizarre places, like the outside of the toilet. Forcing one to then touch the seat cover to place it in the bowl. EWWWW!

I think there is a potty on the second floor behind 269 that isn't well known.... Is that it? Darnie

The Mrs. said...

I dont mind peeing in public but I have issues with... well with the other. It would kill me when I was dating flyboy and would spend the weekend in his house with four other marines. You think public bathrooms are nasty... ick.

Now my issue with public restrooms, well I still have that one, but now I have BIG issues with taking my kids in there. I freak if they touch anything, and small little creatures that they are they touch everything. Not enough bleach in the world for TOUCHING a public toilet.

You know I saw a thing once that the cleanest stall is usually the one closest to the door... most people avoid that one. So thats always my pick!

Anonymous said...

I am right there with you with the bathroom grossness. TOTALLY icks me out.

Anonymous said...

I am right there with you with the bathroom grossness. TOTALLY icks me out.

Anonymous said...

I am right there with you with the bathroom grossness. TOTALLY icks me out.