Tuesday, July 29, 2008

The Best Guest Post You Have Ever Read.

NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!!

No way did The Roaming Southerner give me--McMommy-- the keys to her place while she is away!!

I want to award myself 150 Cool Kid Points for no reason whatsoever other than the fact that I CAN.

Because I'm in charge today.

As any frequent reader of The Roaming Southerner (hereby referred to as TRS) knows, she has an ongoing trivia game...whereby you rack up "Cool Kid Points" every time you answer her trivia questions correctly.

You can see by the scorecard on the sidebar....I have no points.
I never answer the questions in time.
Because someone continually beats me to it.
Well today, I just have one thing to say....

You're going DOWN, Adcock's Circus!

(BAM! I just awarded myself another 30 points for no reason at all.)

Ok, so now that I got that off my chest, here's my conversation with TRS in the days prior...

TRS: "So I'm going away for a few days and was wondering if you could blog-sit while I'm gone."

McMommy (acting all nonchalant): "Umm, whatever. Yeah, I guess so. I don't have to water your plants or anything, do I?"

TRS: "What? You haven't started drinking already, have you? It's only 11am, for crying out loud. Look, just write a guest blog post for me and don't mess with my blog. What are you going to write about?"

McMommy: "I've got the greatest blog post idea ever!!! No hints! It's reallllllllyyyy good though! You are going to love it!!"


Um yeah.


The truth is: I have no flippin' idea what to write about.

I mean, don't get me wrong.....I've tried and tried to think of something to write about.....

I thought about doing a post on my annoying misuse of exclamation points!!! and CAPS and ellipses.....

I thought about ways to freak TRS out about having kids. But I already did that.

I thought about writing a post using super freaky-deaky words that will get her Google Analytics working overtime. But I didn't want to be a boob about it. Or write anything that would make TRS feel emotionally vulnerable and exposed to the wackos out there.
And I don't care what you say, that's the naked truth!!

(350 CPK points for that one! Too bad so sad, Adcock's Circus!)

Oh well, I give up. I don't have a clue about what to write.

But can I offer you these little nuggets (eww! I just said the word nugget! I hate that word!) of wisdom before you leave?

1. Sometimes, it's ok to lie. But only when you have nothing to blog about and TRS has asked you to guest post. And then you name it "The Best Guest Post You Have Ever Read". (Which is obviously another total lie.)

2. Sometimes, it's ok to award yourself an additional 4,000 points to ensure you stay in first place in make-believe trivia contests.

3. Don't ever title your guest post THE BEST GUEST POST YOU HAVE EVER READ. Because that is just wayyyyyyyy too much pressure. And then people will have expectations: Like an actual entertaining blog post.
And the truth is, you've got NOTHING.
And they will totally call you out as The Most Boring Guest Poster Ever.

But then you can tell them: "SO?! Who cares?? I have 50,000 Cool Kid Points and you don't!"

But because I'm don't want you all complaining to TRS that I was the most boring guest poster in the world, I thought I'd bribe...er...send you home with a little parting gift....

25 Cool Kid Points.

(what? You didn't actually think i would bestow enough CPK points to allow you the chance of possibly beating me, did you?)

Now does anyone around here know where the heck her plants are???
post signature


Kristen said...

That was awesome! I hope TRS is somewhere totally laughing right now!

Great job!!

And yes, maybe the best guest post ever!!

How many CKP do we get for leaving comments??

amanda said...



pretty sure this is by far the best guest post ever!!

(are you still going to slip me my 500 ckp for saying that? we had a deal right?)

Aubrey said...

You've done it again! It was the best guest post ever!!

Wendi said...

You got the title right!
This was the best guest post ever!
And just exactly what she would have wanted.
Now... about blog sitting for me next week...How about Tuesday?

Joy said...

If I were drinking milk............

.......... it would've come out my nose! TOO FUNNY!!! Put the McTini AWAY and get back to your blog soon!

The Mom said...

McMommy McRules even at TRS!


Rachael said...

Good job McMommy!

Carol said...

Congrats on being top of the leaderboard!

Too funny!

Beth (A Mom's Life) said...

I love McMommy wherever she is. Even if she cheats at trivia games!

Simply Shannon said...

Dang. Just when I thought that I might be earning points faster than anyone in TRS histoyr, in swoops McMommy to steal my thunder.

Seriously though- So freaking funny that it's just not fair.

Tenakim said...

great guest post- a guest post about a guest post- that's what I did the only time I was asked to do a guest post- it's the presssure, I guess!

Rach (Mommy Learns to Blog) said...

Best. Guest. Post. Ever.
I will surely leave you the keys to my blog any time - my readership would multiply by billions! Which would make it about 4.
Seriously, how do you come up with this stuff?
Now get back to your own blog and create some more McMagic over there!

Lisa said...

You are a complete cheese. And I love it!

Funny reading - thanks :)

Elaine A. said...

I was totally ready for some trivia questions (in which I would have to refer to either my husband or wikipedia for the answers...)

I think you get a boat-load of CPK for this post!
: )

Anonymous said...

You totally made me laugh! More Points for you!

Jen E said...

McMommy, I'm in awe of you, you with your cool kids points - I think I want to be just like you when (if) I grow up, k?

bejewell said...

Ummmm, yeah. I totally love you. (Embarrassment)

So weird that we both lost our guest posting virginity today. I feel oddly bonded.

BUT I DO love the word "nugget.". Sorry.

Charnita's Xpressions said...

That was the best guest post and I woul have recognized your wit anywhere....even if you didn't sign it.
Anf hey, I needed some points!!! In shoulda gotten you to asK me a really easy question that only I woulod know to at least get me 2 points. I can never answer the darn things and i am pretty good at triviA- JUST NOT HERS.

Patrice said...

Brilliant, McMommy!
The fact that you managed to make an amazing post out of the fact that you have nothing to say is well amazing and an ability I wish I had. I wish I had been smart enough to ask a bloggy genius like you to guest post when I went on vacation. I may just have to go on a blog vacation where I just let people who are much better at this than me do the posting for me...
I'm seriously considering that!! haha thanks for the entertaining post! And I'm totally jealous that you got so many cool kid points just because your in charge.. no fair!

Chelle said...

Great job, McMommy! Too good, too funny....and way to go on all of your CK points!!

HappyHourSue said...

See that's how it starts. A great guest post, then more requests, then you find yourself in the ER with an ulcer. And no MCDreamy.

Krystyn said...

Great job, McMommy! And, you made us hunt you down, too!

Can I get some points, too?

matt said...

Kind of reminds me of Seinfeld. Its a post about nothing!

American Mum said...

Wat to go Mcmommy for the BEST guest post EVER!!!! (Note the caps and !!!)

Okay, so I feel soo uncool for not having and CKPs. I'll have to stop by here more often.

MommyTime said...

Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater!

(How many ckp do I get for original and entertaining rhymes?)

Nicely done. And very funny.

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

I would so call it best guest post ever ;)

Adcock Circus said...

The sweet taste of victory was so close... great post McMommy!

The Roaming Southerner said...

Sorry to burst your awesome bubble McMommy!!! I will be ruling on the 1st CK award later this week....Adcock is looking pretty good in the standings.

Thanks for posting for me...you really are hilarious!

Not so exciting Andi said...

Somehow you made a post about not having anything to write about hilarious. You are a comedic genius!

Anonymous said...

This is most definitely the best guest post ever!!.....!!!!!

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